Warning: Macs May Cause Irritability

I'm a pretty technically oriented person, and anyone who knows me will attest to that. I can fix nearly any problem that comes up on a PC, and I'm pretty good on the Mac too (I have worked as a Mac technician at a school - though for only a short period of time). So why am I having such a hard time fixing my Mac at home? It's simple. Apple has created a method of causing their computers to self destruct. Oh and also Macs suck (YES I am allowed to say that because I use Macs as much as I use PCs, every day of the week, so don't think that I'm just some PC guy who has never used a Mac before). Here's the run down. My wife was given an iMac quite some time ago, and it has been running OS 9 quite well since I did a clean install on the drive. Lately, I have been considering making the update to OS X and just yesterday was given a copy (yes a legit copy before someone out there calls the piracy police). I want to set up iStore because I bought my wife an MP3 player for Christmas. Some of this story will make me look like an idiot, but that's okay, read on if you will. I read on the install notes that if you have an old firmware version, to update it before installing OS X. It ALSO said in the install notes that if you DO have an old firmware version, you will be prompted and will not be able to install the software. No biggie, right? So I boot off of the OS X CD and everything seems to be in order, no prompts, and I start walking through the install process. I wanted to partition the drive, so I did, and then erased the contents of both partitions and proceed with the install. THEN, only after all of this, I get the dialog that tells me I have to update the firmware, AFTER I already partitioned and removed my OS 9. Why, oh WHY Apple did you not just add something to the installer that would check the firmware version, apparently half of the people updating have had this same issue - and the ones that follow. I boot from the OS 9 CD and reinstall. I downloaded the firmware update, and then it tells me I need to update to OS 9.1 before I can update the firmware, so I did that too. And now at this point the computer decided that it wanted to kill me by giving me an aneurism, so it shut itself down, and since, I have not been able to get it to boot up fully again. Read on. So, I zapped the PRAM, as is a common practice to resolve simple issues with Mac boot problems, and then read online about 10 minutes later "Do NOT zap the PRAM, as this will only worsen the problem". Great, nice move. So then I read an article about resetting the PMU (I think that's what it's called). It's a small button on the mainboard, and I found it and while searching for it I kinda pressed it. So then I remembered that you're supposed to hold it for about a half second, so I did that. Then I read online about 10 minutes later "Do NOT press the PMU button more than once, as this can fry the mainboard on the computer". Great, nice move again. At this point, I am at a loss, what else could go wrong? The computer will start to boot, but the monitor will not come on (apparently something to do with the OS X installer setting the screen refresh to some level that the built in monitor cannot handle, and this is resolved in the firmware update that was supposed to be done before all you-know-what broke loose in my Mac). And on top of that, the computer will NOT boot beyond about 5 or 6 seconds. I press the power button, the computer starts up (no monitor display) and then after a few seconds, it just shuts off. Anyone in the Charlotte/Lee/Sarasota County area of Florida that wouldn't mind coming to fix my wife's iMac? I can't afford to pay you, but I'll buy you lunch or something, but we have to eat at Burger King or something, I hope that's okay. I cannot get it to boot any further than this, no matter what. If I can get it to boot and not shut down, even if the built-in monitor doesn't work, I can likely fix it. I have a few other options that I will try when I get home (external monitor, leave unplugged for a long time, remove battery, unplug components, programmer reset, boot into firmware update mode, etc. etc.) If that doesn't work, I guess I'll be practicing my hammer throw tonight - I need exercise anyway.

Holiday Drivers

I have noticed that there are 3 types of drivers during the holidays, particularly on Christmas Eve. Type 1: "Just Doin' My Thing Because I'm Already Done Shopping!" Driver. This is the person who drives on Christmas Eve as if it is just another day in the year. These are the drivers who deserve recognition and honor during the holiday season. They uphold the rules of the road, both written and unwritten, and serve as a magnificent example of patience and diligence. To you "Just Doin' My Thing Because I'm Already Done Shopping" Drivers, I tip my hat. Or, my hatless head - in absence of a hat. Type 2: "AH CRAP, It's Christmas Eve and I Haven't Even Done My Shopping Yet!" Driver. On a scale of 1 to 10 for aneurism/heart-attack-causing-driver-type-ranking, these types of drivers receive about an 8.5. I can understand their rage-like driving and their horn-honking and their ridiculous attitude, but I cannot say that I relate. I know there are people that just get busy during the season, and so I cannot say that I hate these types of drivers, but I can say that they annoy me, and that I do not like them. No you're not allowed to go first just because your car is green (or red, or mauve/puce, or rusty, or a Cadillac, or a motorcycle, or a bicycle, or a segway, or a unicycle), no I wasn't telling you to go first, or trying to keep you behind me and stuck in the road when I waved people to walk across the crosswalk in front of me (because they DO have the right of way), and NO you are probably not going to find an XBox, GameCube, PS2 or iPod at Circuit City, Best Buy or Target on Christmas Eve. To you "AH CRAP, It's Christmas Eve and I Haven't Even Done My Shopping Yet!" Drivers, I say, "Learn a lesson from this, and think of your fellow man this holiday season. Both his safety, and his sanity." Type 3: "No Please, You Go First, And Have A Merry Christmas!" Driver. By FAR, the most annoying type of driver. Let me further explain: Have you ever come to a 4-way intersection at which your lane, and only your lane, had a stop sign? I'm sure you have. Now, does it make you uncomfortable when you're waiting for someone to drive across the intersection in front of you, but instead, they slow down and come to a stop - regardless of the fact that they do not have a stop sign? And then you play the "who is going to go first" game, where you both stop and go, and inch towards eachother in a ridiculous fashion. Gas - Brake - Gas - Brake until eventually you're so close to eachother that you touch bumpers. Literally, you are both flagging the other person to go, and then they flag you onwards, and then you both advance. It's stupid, it's annoying, and it's really frustrating. I have a stop sign, you don't. To you, "No Please, You Go First, And Have A Merry Christmas!" Drivers, I say "Just GO Already!" I like Christmas, I love people, I just don't like it when people break the law - in a mean way, or in an overly nice way. Merry Christmas Everyone, sorry this is a few days late.

Happy Pseudo-Thursday!

Welcome to the Wednesday before Christmas, which is also known to many (or just to me) as Pseudo-Thursday. See, Friday is a day off, which means we don't work, which makes it Saturday Part 1, and since Saturday is still Saturday (because Sunday is still Sunday) then Saturday is Saturday Part 2. At some point this week, we lost a day. Good for us! If you're confused, then I assume you're still living in Wednesday.

That's BP for the Ridiculously Priced Gas

There is this BP gas station where I live, and they were charging $2.06/gal. of gas, and right next door (literally, about 300 feet away) there is a Shell station which charges $1.96/gal. It frustrates me so much that these losers can charge so much for gas and people still pay it. See, what happens is that the places in town charge on average between $1.92 - $1.98 or so per gallon, but because they are trying to keep the gas prices low (thank you to all of you) they run out of gas pretty quickly sometimes - or they're so busy that even trying to find an available pump can be an experience in itself. So there I was, filling up my tank at the BP station because the Shell station was out of gas. That makes me mad; BP, you SUCK. OH, which reminds me, I have another BP station story, oh my you will love this. My wife and I went to Georgia/Tennessee for our honeymoon 2 and a half years ago, and all the way there we kept seeing signs for BP (which is actually a very big chain of gas stations) saying "Stop at BP! You'll Love Our Clean Restrooms!" When we did decide to make a pit stop, the horrid condition of the restrooms was enough to prevent us from going near a BP to use the restroom, even to this day (I mean, baaaad bad bad, like "hey port-0-potties are bad, but try putting a full one in a giant paint-shaker" bad.) So, with that said: BP, you've been black-listed. Permanently.

Warning! Shoe and/or Foot Anomaly, Dead Ahead!

Right shoe/foot: fine. Left shoe/foot: stupid, and dumb, and crazy! What is WRONG with my left shoe, or perhaps my left foot. I have this pair of shoes that my wife bought for me about a year and a half ago, I love them. They're brown casual shoes, and I think she got them for really cheap, but they still look like new and they're really comfortable. However, the left lace has some sort of something something wrong with it which allows it to come undone so often during the day, that occasionally I just let it stay undone (seriously, like 5 or 6 times a day ... my right shoe has not once come undone that I'm aware of.) So, I sit here in my chair, creating websites, and my shoe unties itself. Sounds like a wonderful story, will make a note to start a novel. A few weeks ago my wife was kind enough to buy me a super duper nice pair of Doc Martens, and they're nice and comfy and guess what: Yes, that's right, the left lace comes undone on these shoes too. I'm beginning to think I'm harboring ghosts in my left foot, or socks. Or maybe my toes are being mischevious. I'm very afraid.

Oh Oh Oh! Another Thing About School!

Always make sure you know what days exams are on, and never assume differently. Otherwise, you will show up to class and your Statistics professor will say "Okay everyone here's your exam." *ZOINK* That's the sound of my stomach imploding into itself at the realization that I have not read the chapter, I have been away for a week in Georgia, and basically, I don't even know what the information on the test is about. Fortunately for me, it was an open book test, as they all are, and based on my score in the class already, anything over 50% on this exam will guarantee me an A in the class (no less than 90%). So, the exam begins, and I open my textbook and begin to read: "Chapter 6 ... section 1 ... 50 pages to go." I tend to do well in situations like this, I'm not sure why - I can only imagine it has something to do with the fact that in highschool I would find myself doing this on a near-daily basis. I never studied, so every exam was basically improvisation on my part. Ah well, the moral of the story is that just because I did end up getting 90% on the exam and an overall 99.0% in the class, there's no reason to be a slacker.

Got Annoying Advertising Slogan?

Okay, so Milk had an awesome campaign with the "Got Milk?" slogan, SO much so in fact, that it's still in use today, 10 years later ... by every other company in the world. I have seen it all: - Got Mold? - Got Advertising? - Got Cold? (Air conditioning repair service - I think) - Got Product-X? Argh, I feel like just finding out whoever is in charge of each of these companies (or whoever was responsible for their Got Annoying? advertisements) and throwing them in a vat of ice-cold milk where they will be forced to synchronize swim with eachother to a repetitive beat of "GOT MILK, GOT MOLD, GOT ADVERTISING, GOT COLD". Stop overusing the slogan. NO it's not cool, NO it's not effective, and YES it did die in the 90's, just let it rest ... that's all it wants.