A Tale of Pizza

I usually eat really good, organic food and yesterday I ate about 3/4 of a large Domino's pizza. Today I feel like I swallowed a possum and now it's making a nest in my guts.

Domino's Undelivers!

It's 11:00 P.M.--it's late and my wife and I are hungry. After careful consideration, the decision for a source of sustenance is Domino's Pizza. I'm not a particular fan of their grease-infused chlorine-flour, preservative-fest pizza, but figured I'd have a go for old time's sake (besides, it tastes great and options are limited near midnight). When I pulled up in front of their store it appeared closed, though with doughboys at work in the back. The sign on the door says it's open until 2:00 A.M., but the man inside waving his arms and fingers and making funny faces is telling me otherwise. After an improv sign language conversation where little more than "what??" was said, he finally unlocked the door and spoke to me in person. Our conversation was as follows: Me: Hey, I'd like to order a pizza. Not Me: We're closed right now, but we can deliver. Me: I have a car right here in the parking lot; can I make an order and have you deliver it to my car out here? Not Me: No, but we can deliver to your house.