Uh, Yeah ... Don't Do That.

Woman tries to swallow cell phone to keep it away from her boyfriend. In other news, I have just finished reading a great book. I don't want anyone else to read it, so I'm going to swallow it. I sincerely hope she's okay, but lady, what were you thinking?

Whoa, You Lost Me After Rock, Paper, Scissors, Gun, Monkey, Dragon, Cockroach

This is by far the funniest thing I've seen all day (considering my day has consisted mainly of reviewing statistics and marketing analysis type stuff, with some research in the mix - regardless, it's still funny). You'll have to read to learn more, but essentially this is a game of rock-paper-scissors with a few additional gestures thrown in for good measure (up to 25 total), with information on what beats what, and why. It's truly mind boggling, but you KNOW I'm going to learn every single one and start playing, even if I have to play against myself. http://www.umop.com/rps.htm Thanks to Glen Gordon for the link, and the free software.

This is a Test

This is a test - I ran into some technical issues with my blog the past few weeks (not Blogger.com's fault), so I've been inactive. I'm just testing to see if it works. I'll leave this post up because, frankly, I'm too lazy to delete it.

Hmm, Sad, But Also Kind Of Interesting

Firstly, you must read the article by clicking here. A very sad story, however I was taken aback by the questioning statement "It was not clear why the grenade exploded". I have only one word to say to that: grenade.

Further Proof That People Are Stupid

http://www.guardian.co.uk/science/story/0,3605,1585977,00.html Need I say more? And in case you're not familiar with it, do a search for 'Spanish Flu' on Google. Oh and let's not forget a previous post of mine: how a couple of mice that had the Plague just disappeared from a laboratory a few weeks ago.

Air Freshener HOOOAAH!

The other day, as my wife and I exited from a ramp on the interstate and pulled up to a light to turn left. I looked over into an SUV that had a few air fresheners hanging about inside. How many, you ask? Well, in the time that we waited, I counted at least 24; however I was unable to count accurately from the groups that were bunched together. I think it fair to guess there were possibly double what I had counted, but I can't be sure. Even 24 is too much. And different scents too, not all the same. Must have smelled like a ... well, I quite frankly don't know what could smell that pungent, except for maybe Sex Panther™. I hear it has a formidable scent.

Coolest Job Title In The World

Nazi Hunter. That's right, Nazi Hunter. Doesn't that just convey a feeling of real-life superheroism? Like "Vampire Hunter" or "Zombie Killer". I would even go so far as to say it is a legendary title to leave as a legacy (whoa alliteration alert!). In case you're wondering, I got the name from here: http://www.theinquirer.net/?article=26346.

Sales Person, Apply Within (or Without, I Don't Care)

Are you a sales person? Can you sell banner spots and marketing campaign offers? Would you like to make a great salary and work with awesome people like me? Well if so, then you're in luck! No this isn't a work-from-home or get-rich-quick scheme, this is an actual job opening. The company I work for (ComputerJobs.com) is currently looking to hire an Ad Sales Rep for the Marketing Communications department. If you would like to apply for this job, I would highly recommend that you post a comment to this blog, and I can send you details about how to apply. I can give details about who to contact and whatnot. There will be a posting up soon on ComputerJobs.com, and I'll try to post that link as soon as we have it up. Also, be sure to tell them that Travis sent you, I'm in good with these people. Also, I ate too much for lunch and now my stomach is trying to work its way out of my torso. Keyword spamalicioustastic: IT job computer job sales job marketing advertising job opening great salary sales rep computers banners resume tech job.

Mice With Plague Disappear

Well, they didn't just disappear, obviously they went somewhere. If you would like details on this story, feel free to read about Mice Infected With Bubonic Plague Missing. I know I would certainly like to know where they might have ended up.

Federal official said the mice may never be accounted for. Among other things, the rodents may have been stolen, eaten by other lab animals or just misplaced in a paperwork error.

Okay, um, maybe I'm being a little overcautious here, but shouldn't they be a little more careful with mice that are carrying the black plague? "Woops, I misplaced the three mice that had bubonic plague - now what?" "Umm, I dunno ... let's go home early?" Next time maybe they can just accidently replace sugar with Ebola virii, or replace flu shot medication with Spanish Flu. Or hell, just shoot us all, it's probably cheaper anyway. Seriously, come on.

What A Night

Nope I wasn't up partying all night - heck I wasn't even up not partying all night. I played around on the computer until about 1:00 a.m., and then decided I should go to bed so I would be ready for Friday (today!). After taking the dog outside for one last hurrah, I came back inside, got ready for bed, and crawled under the covers. Then the dog started whining, and whining, and whining, and just continued on. But this was no ordinary whine, this was one that would escalate the deeper I fell into sleep. When I would wake up, she would be quiet, but as I drifted off into sleep, she would whine louder and louder ... and then the aneurysms came, nearly. This is all on top of the fact that Kim had no voice left yesterday and she was already exhausted from a week of hard work. Long story short, I took her outside again at about 2 a.m., she did her business (again), and then I put her in her kennel in the spare room, where I also slept all night (on a couch, not in the kennel). I also threw pillows at her kennel every time she yelped and whined, for about a half hour until I finally slipped into a blissful coma. Woke up tired which is the worst feeling in the world as far as I'm concerned. Fed the dog, she was being super hyper which I just was not in the mood for so I did a lot of "NO!"-ing this morning. OH, and then, she peed on the floor which I had to clean up even though I was already running late for work. (I also got stopped by a flagger on my way to work while some construction workers did tasks that took entirely too long). I think the highlight of my morning was that our dog knows that if she pees on the floor, she gets swatted. But she remembers from back in her puppy days (one week ago) that if she pees on papers, she does not get swatted. So, she put these facts together in her dog brain, and ripped a bunch of toilet paper off the roll when I wasn't looking, arranged them into a pile in the middle of the floor, and peed on that. I mean, yeah, I have to consider that she tried to be clean, but I was still mad that she made peepee on my floorfloor.

Something You Should Always Remember About Puppies ...

Do NOT leave a puppy in a room with enough food and water to last it a week thinking that it will just eat when it's hungry - especially when said puppy is used to not eating much at the animal shelter because her brothers will not let her near food. Said puppy will NOT just eat when it is hungry. No. No it will not. Said puppy will eat all food, and drink all water, and proceed to create more puppy pee and puppy poo than is imaginable - even in worlds where puppies grow larger than dinosaurs and eat nothing but prunes. Feed puppies in moderation, or risk being woken up at 4:00 a.m. because you "smell something odd". Other than that first night, the puppy we brought home is great. She's cute, she's cuddly, and she farts a lot.

You Know What We Need?

Stricter laws on looting after a disaster. Minimum 20 years in prison, or shoot on site. It doesn't have to be any more complicated than that.

Gas Sucks

Gas gas gas gas gas gasoline gas prices filling up gas gallon gasoline gas. There, enough keyword spamming, hopefully you found this blog using a search engine and I've successfully wasted some of your time. There is a panic ensuing in Atlanta right now, and I'm stuck in the middle of it. Somehow over night, the city has run out of gas (yeah that crappy toxic material we put in our pollution machines so we can get to work every day). Just out of nowhere, people are rushing the gas stations and blocking up all the roads and using up what little is left, all in the name of filling their tanks. This really sucks. I'm going home now. I have an empty tank in my truck, and no chance of filling it before tomorrow. Hopefully I don't run out on the way in tomorrow. You know what I really think of gasoline? I hate it.

I Just Saved a Bunch of Money on my Car Insurance by Switching to Geico

No, it's true, I really really did. K here's the scoop - and it's much better than ice cream: We have been using Met Life for our auto insurance for as long as we've been married, and Kim has been using it since well before that time, for about eight years to date. We have clean records, have only ever been in one accident for which we were not at fault (100% not at fault - hit from behind at a stop light), and the only claim that we ever made aside from the accident was because our vehicles suffered the wrath of Hurricane Charley in 2004, so the claim covered all of the scratches. Almost everyone in Southwest Florida made a claim, it's not like we were the only ones. Now, this may seem ignorant, but considering we have a legal obligation to have insurance, and that we pay a ridiculous portion of our salary to have it - doesn't it make a whole lot of sense that when something happens, our insurance company (read: the company we pay a ton of money to in the case that something happens) should help us foot the costs for reparation? Further, doesn't it make a lot of sense that in the cases where the something is not our fault, that it should not affect our payments? Well, not such is the case with Met Life. When we lived in Florida, we paid less than $1000 for good coverage, I think around $850 or so. They were a good company and took very, very good care of us, so I will not discount that. Then we moved to Georgia, and our rates suddenly shot up to $1755 for six months of coverage - $3510 a year to be insured - more than our car payment - $292.50 a month - stupid. When I asked a sales rep why the fees were so high, her response was that we had been in three accidents. Three accidents? But didn't you say just one?! Yes, yes I did. ONE accident, and TWO hurricane scratched cars - none our fault, but which caused our rates to more than double. So what did I do? I got an online quote from Geico, and called to verify it: less than $750 for six months. Talked it over with my wife, re-verified our Met Life rates to make sure there wasn't an error, and then within a half hour we were Geico customers. I will be canceling our Met Life policy tonight, with a few other words thrown in to make the phone call exciting. Sorry Met Life, we liked you while we had you, but for now, we just can't justify spending an extra $2100 or so a year just to be insured.

Hmm, What to Talk About Today?

Okay, let me think of a good topic to talk about. Granted, there are many, but I just don't have the energy nor the care to think one up. Sure, I could complain about gas prices, or taxes, or eminent domain (I promise if a person ever walked up to me and told me they supported eminent domain, I would punch them in the face - I don't care who it is, as long as I get that shot in; I'm not an angry person, I just hate stupidity). Also, be sure to check out this article to see what people with my view, and a lot of money, are doing. I don't know what to write about, to be honest. I just wanted to have an update on my blog today. Have fun reading about people having their homes taken away and demolished so that greedy developers could put up light poles - and yes, that really happened, right here in Atlanta.

What The Fudge? Gas More Expensive Than Diamonds?!

No, not really, but damn close. Last week when I filled up my truck, the price was $2.30/gal. which was really high compared to a few weeks before that. Today (yes, about 7 days later) I pulled up to the pump and could do nothing but sneer in disgust after looking at the pump, reading the gas price at $2.60/gal. A 30-cent increase in about a week, now that's just disgusting. It costs me about $3 more to fill up my tank this week than it did last week, and that's for a small gas tank. I have about the smallest gas tank you can get on a vehicle - about 11 gallons, and I stopped when the stupid pump hit $30, and it wasn't even full! I remember just 2 years ago being able to fill up my car for less than $20 ... in Florida ... where the gas prices are even higher than here in Georgia. All I can say is I hurt for those of you who opted for SUVs, I can only guess you're hitting about $80-100 per fill up. You know what, I'm sick of it, and sadly, there's nothing I can do except say this: Boo hiss to all you idiots in charge. Yes, that's right, idiots. GM, hurry up with your fuel-cell cars so I don't have to walk around angry anymore - this is just getting stupid. Anyway, this will probably be old by the time anyone reads it, but here is a graph: http://www.georgiagasprices.com/retail_price_chart.aspx Check out the pattern over the course of a year. Yeah, I know - ugh. Just ugh, and stupid, and I might be acting like a big baby and complaining, but I don't care.

Guess What I Found In My Bathroom!

No, no it's not what you're thinking. I found a scorpion in my bathroom. I have to say, that was exciting. I didn't know we had scorpions in Georgia, but now I have proof! (I even took pictures)

Let's See, What's New?

Got a free [practically] new 15" LCD from my boss. Bought a $25 computer to replace the one I had that was worth nothing whatsoever. Still have a great job, even after a month and a half, and a great wife, even after 3 years. Life is good.

Another Test

Yeah that's right.

Just a Test

I'm testing my RSS feed, you can ignore this post if you'd like, or read it. If it's really all that great, add it to your favorites and leave a comment - I really don't care. Just don't complain about it.

My Blog Was Lonely, So I Gave A Post

Oh good blog, how long has it been - and you - how have you fared in my absence? It's been a while since I've opened up this thing, but I've gotten a hit or two so I figure I should give my loyal readers something to do while they're here. I recently started a new job with ComputerJobs.com in Atlanta after moving from Southwest Florida. I have been using the ComputerJobs.com website to search for jobs for years now, and only recently did I inquire about a job here. Lo and behold, within a month of my initial inquiry, I had an offer to join the company's marketing department as a graphic designer / web developer. Things worked out quite well to get me here, and I couldn't be happier - the job is great, the people are great, everything is just great. I don't really have a ton of news other than that, to be honest. I don't have any crazy client phone calls, no weird things have happened to me in a while (no wonder I don't post on here anymore), and no big events. I will say that it's my 3rd anniversary in a week, and I'm completely lost for ideas on what to do for Kim. She doesn't read this thing, so I can talk about it all I want. ;) I guarantee however, because I wrote that, she'll make an unexpected visit to read this. Lastly, I will point out that my wife's website is coming along great. If you've not yet visited it, be sure to check it out by visiting http://www.mrsnelsonsclass.com. She has worked really hard on it, and she would be very happy if you would stop in and take a look around. I will have to come up with an interesting story, this post has become quite boring - I've almost fallen asleep writing it. So, without further ado: have a nice day.

Ready, Set, Hooray!

Got me a job, an amazing job - an amazingly amazing job. I start June 6th. I am so excited, I don't know what to do with myself. Maybe I should do some work since I still have a current job. Yeah that's a good idea!

Too Many Thoughts

It's been about a month since I made a posting, the reason being that I have been busy. My mind has been roaming about, like a moth, fluttering to-and-fro - a destination in mind, but with no path to follow. This is my last week at work, and my last in Florida. This weekend, my wife and I will be packing our now-boxed belongings into a truck, and starting a new life in a new city, in a new state - hopefully in one of mind as well. I feel that work has become only a place now where I sit and wait out the days before I need no longer come. Work becomes harder to do by the day, and yet more important and ever-more due. The hours are flying by as if to mock me, knowing the procrastinator that I am, and though my initiative is high, my morale is low. I have oft struggled with the opposite: high morale and low initiative. I feel sad that my time here has come to an end, and though the past weeks have been filled with excitement and anticipation, my thoughts have been filled anew with anxiety and stress, two feelings with which I rarely struggle. I have no fears, however; I rarely fear change. I look around my office; the white walls have become so familiar to me. I feel though that this environment is no longer a place of comfort to me, for no reason other than it being a temporary place of work. I have discovered it part of my personality that when I no longer see a future at my place of work, I begin counting the days until I will leave - this counting begins to consume me. I feel like I am a hard worker, but why do I find it so hard to work? Perhaps the knowledge that change is scary, perhaps the knowledge that things will not ever be the same. I am a person who nests, who finds a place and sticks. I like to think I am outgoing and adventurous, perhaps I am not ... I do not mean to sound somber, or melancholy, or pessimistic. I have much excitement about our move, and the promise of new work, new friends, and new adventures. I feel that I could have been a better employee, though I do not feel as if I was a bad one. Who will replace me when I am gone? I can only hope someone that has my knowledge, plus more, tagged with a strong work ethic. I think I am ready for the change, though I am never ready until it happens. I am ready to start a new life in a new place. The rest of my life starts today, it's time for me to start taking bigger steps forward - the stairs are certainly becoming larger.

kj-ifqjeioqj

The following post is a summary of my own opinions, and only my own opinions. Anything written to be understood as factual is a product of my own understanding, and is written solely by me, with no reference to any outside source aside from the link to the article - note however that much of this information will closely resemble information found on various other sites. I will stress firstly that I have no desire to sway anyone's opinion, or infringe on any rights of any person or organization. I am passionate about people, and I hate sickness. This alone is my inspiration for writing this. Dammit, this kind of crap makes me so mad. Debunking Cancer Myths on MSN.com. I don't care who tells you what, cancer is a preventable disease. Do some research sometime for yourself, investigate where cancer actually comes from - our body manufactures it, our entire lives, and our immune system keeps it under control. That's what the immune system does, that's its purpose - to keep us from becoming sick, or to fix us when we do get sick. Cancer occurs naturally when our immune system is too busy fighting off all the other poisons we are exposed to (in our food, in our air, in our water). So when we stop putting the crap in our bodies, living in toxic environments, and start actually questioning why we're the sickest country in the world (might I also add that we consume more than two-thirds of the world's pharmaceutical products - and yes, still the sickest, fattest country), only then will we start to see a change, and have finally found a "solution" for cancer. Forget "cure", it's a dead word and it's wholly owned by the modern-medical world. If we could finally tune in and start "preventing" disease, we would have no need for cures. And yeah, it's true - I'm not a doctor, but I'm also not an idiot. When 4 out of 5 people in the country are dying from heart disease or cancer, it's time to wake up. Remove the blinders and start asking questions. We are a farm. We are cultivating disease, and spending billions of dollars to then cure it. Why would we do that? Curing diseases is profitable; it generates more money than any other industry in the country. A father would give his own life to obtain medicine that will cure cancer in his son, daughter or wife; why then would he not give all of his money? (BECAUSE I NEED TO WRITE THIS TO PROTECT MYSELF: I make no claims, whatsoever, to the validity of the information in this posting. I take no responsibility for any loss that may occur as a result of this information. I am not a doctor, nor do I claim to be one. I will say however, that I am concerned about the state of this country and its people - please, do some research, come to your own conclusions. It's a free country, take advantage of that.)

SOLD

Sorry, not for sale. But thanks for looking. I am worth $2,115,350.00 on HumanForSale.com How much are YOU worth?

If You're Going To Yell, Do It In Tenor!

Thought this story deserved blogification: My wife and I have cell phones, and we have unlimited mobile-to-mobile minutes, so we talk pretty well every day at least at some point. We have been having a problem with her phone, where when she is talking to someone, it will disconnect. And it's not the cell phone service, because she can be sitting in a high-service area, and not move, and it will disconnect - this happens in almost every conversation that lasts over five minutes, and it frustrates me (and her) every time it happens. The other day I was driving on the interstate and trying to call to check my voicemail, but I was in a dead zone so I couldn't get a good signal. Then a couple of minutes later, I got in, and while checking messages I got an incoming call from my wife which I answered. We talked for a few minutes when all of a sudden I heard the *bloopity bloop* sound which means we were disconnected. I held the phone out in front of me and yelled at it - but this was no ordinary yell. It was more of an opera singing yell, and it went like "PIEEEECE OF CRAP TELEPHOOOOOONE!". After my solo, I looked at the phone and the display said: "Call Time: 01:24" and it was counting upwards. Placing the phone to my ear, I whispered a confused "hello?" to which my wife replied "ummm, hello...?" I had been disconnected from my voicemail after having taken the other call, and my wife was the unfortunate victim of my opera-singing rage.

Signs That You Went To Bed Too Late And/Or Didn't Sleep Enough:

How do you determine you haven't had enough sleep (or that you went to bed too late)?:

• You wake up with the taste of fresh toothpaste still in your mouth
• You are suddenly startled awake, and you find yourself in a desk; there is a blank piece of paper in front of you and a pen in your hand. After looking around a bit, you realize you're in the middle of an "assignment" in "english class".
• You fight to keep your eyes open, but you look really stupid because all you're actually doing is raising up your eyebrows - your eyes are still half closed.
• Every person on your Instant Messenger and ICQ list has an away status.
• You have yawccups (you yawn uncontrollably about once every 30 seconds)

Hmm, Most People Just Hang Up!

Names in the following correspondence have been replaced to protect the innocent, annoying fools that plague me every single day without rest. Forgive my grammatical slaughterhouse, but I'm typing it as it was said in an attempt to relay the tone of the message. Message 1: "Ummm hello Travis this is Gunther over at Jimmy's Cosmetics and Kayak Depot - listen we're having a problem with our email server not connecting it's giving us errors and I've tried both email servers you gave me but neither of them are working. Give me a call back it's an emergency." Message 2 - three minutes later: "... *shuffle* ... *click*." Message 3 - yet three minutes later: " ... *click*." Message 4 - three minutes later, again: "... *shuffle* ... *shuffle* ... *click*." Now let it be known that we have a fairly long message on our answering machine, long enough that it would not be hard for a person to logically reason out the fact that they are listening to an answering machine message, and decide whether or not they want to leave a message before the beep. Normally I just hang up before I hear the beep, I don't much like listening to answering machine messages, but I guess I can't speak for our friend Gunther here. Oh and then I came into work, got here at 9:00 exactly, and he calls again to tell me he's been "trying to get a hold of me!", to which I said "okay, well, here I am" in a not-so-subtle "dude, you have managed to annoy me and it's only 9:00" voice. As many things that happen to me are, it was one of those "had to be there" things, just be glad that you weren't.

Hey! Lady! Take Out That Potato And Put Your Brain Back In!

True Story, part 1 of 1: My wife and I were at Edison Bros. Bagels in the city of rich, elderly women, and while in line we ordered bagel-food and two Cool Caps (iced cappuccinos). While eating and waiting for our drinks, we noticed that it was taking quite some time for them to call us to go pick them up; Kim decided to go up to the counter and wait for them, and perhaps ask about them if it seemed like they had been forgotten about. Now is when it all falls apart, ready? GO! The girl at the register comes out from behind the counter and asks Kim "Did you get your Cool Caps yet?" to which she replied "No, not yet." Then the lady gets this annoyed look on her face and says "Well I have NO idea whose these are then!" and then walks out into the seating area and starts calling out "COOL CAPS! I have two cool caps here for pickup!" flustered as if fatigued from the experience. Then Kim asks her: "Sorry did you ask me if I HAD gotten them yet?" and the girl says "Yes, and did you?" ... "No ... not yet." Again, annoyed look and an "I have no idea WHO these belong to" attitude; she then walks back behind the register and starts ringing in orders. So anyway, I didn't understand it one bit. Kim just walked up to another guy and said "Those Cool Caps are mine, thank you." And if that story didn't entertain you (and yes I DID start a sentence with "and", it's legal now so don't hit that second "1" on your phone) then ponder on these few things:

• Swimming environment preference: Ketchup, Spaghetti, Manwich or Mayo? (yes you do have to pick one)
• Can you make up a new letter, and actually have it make sense?
• Can you make up a new number, and actually have it make sense?
• Can you make up a new color, and actually be able to describe it?
• iPos (woops, I mean iPod, probably shouldn't mention what the "s" means in the former) or any other portable music player on "shuffle" mode?
• If you could force any job/career on any person in the world, what job would it be, and to whom would you give it?
• Would you rather create software that works on 50% of computers present day, and 100% of computers in the near future, or 100% of computers present day and 75% of computers in the near future?

... end transmission.

The Real Problem With The Education System

WARNING: This entry is not suited for everyone, and it contains enough tangents in its content that you may need an air sickness bag. It's basically just a rant - a justified one at that, I think. It has become quite clear to me over the past few weeks/months that the corporate heirarchy that exists in the U.S. is rather weighted to one side regarding salary (I will not say all, there are many people that deserve the money they make, and even more) and corporate spending. I read an article tonight on MSN (link) that I found rather frustrating. If you happen to disagree with me, then I apologize that you can't relate. My wife is a teacher, and she is a good teacher. I have had the opportunity on several occasions to witness her during her work day, among many other teachers (I at one point worked as a computer technician for a school she taught at) and I must say that she is no less than an absolutely amazing teacher. Her kids learn much more than they are expected to, they have fun, they grow together and her class is, overall, a community of growth - mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, you name it. Of particular interest to me in the article was the fact that education administrators are within the top 12 paying jobs overall in the U.S. in 2004. Now before you start hitting me with blunt objects, I am not saying that this is such a bad thing; however I have to question why teachers are so poorly paid and drive economy cars, and why the school administrators drive Lexus and Mercedes. Unless you've had your head buried in the sandbox you are no doubt aware of the fact that teachers are poorly paid, period. "But they get two months vacation a year" you might say - no, no they don't, I'm not sure where you got that figure, maybe from the facade of the term "summer vacation" which trust me, is not as much a vacation as you might want to believe; whatever time taken during the summers for relaxation is more than well deserved for teachers' ten- and twelve-hour days during the school year. I have seen ridiculous amounts of money spent on the part of a school to make a name for itself, while sacrificing money in areas most needed - one example that comes to mind is an annual conference at the largest hotel in town, free hotel rooms for teachers, as much wine and cheese as you can fill your face with, additional materials such as bags and books. Another example would be the catered lunches that administration enjoys, no doubt for which payment is taken from the school's petty cash box. I have seen it all, and I have seen enough. Why does this bother me? Teachers are not paid their due. Let me say it again: Teachers are NOT paid their due. I cannot stand, and frankly I get rather upset when my wife tells me that a certain administrator has scheduled a meeting with her to "go over the number of copies she made this month" which, by the way was a note sitting on her lunch tray one afternoon - the same lunch tray she received as recognition for being teacher of the week. "Hey, here you go, you're a great teacher and we want to reward you with a free lunch ... oh and by the way, you made too many copies last month, please schedule a meeting with administration to discuss this." Nice. Are you trying to tell me that the school is justified in spending money liberally in areas NOT related to the children's education? When did the school system become a conglomerate of corporations with presidents and more focus on dress code and fois gras, than education. Oh yeah, and if you think all of those supplies you see in the classroom were bought and paid for by the school, forget it. It's likely that 90% of it was paid for by the teacher out of their own pocket. Teachers are lucky if they get a small budget for their classroom for the year, at least in the schools I have heard about. I can't stand it anymore. I see teachers helpless to do anything because of the power of a choice few people up at the front or sitting at their desks at the county school board office. I see administrators bending to the whim of parents without consideration of the opinions or feelings of their own employees - the teachers, and ultimately costing the teachers more time, more of their own personal money, and creating more work every day. Happy teacher of the week award - don't make so many copies next month. Give me a break, smarten up.

Look Ma, I'm On The News!

SO, what exactly do you write in a blog when you have a reporter and a camera focused on the screen? Well, everything following is exactly what you write, apparently. Enjoy: Thanks for visiting my blog, I had a very interesting day at work today. I worked really hard, not unlike any other day (of course). And as always, I got more work done than I probably should have. As I am sitting here writing in my blog, I am thinking about my ride home, and how slow the traffic was, and how much traffic there was, and of course, I am still tense from the experience. Ah well, so how was your day? So today was an experience in itself. I got home from work and there in my driveway sat two WINK TV vans, and the people came in and set up hot lights which they shone directly on me, and then video taped me for EVER. (just kidding) So right now I'm typing away, and the camera cannot see what I am writing, but that's okay because they'll probably use this in part of their editing anyway. And now they're zoomed RIGHT IN ON MY FACE, oh wow this is weird, and now they're panning to my hands, OH yeah, there we go. So this is rather interesting. I've never been in a situation quite like this before. OKAY, and now the camera is off. And now I think it's back on again, I really don't know and I don't want to look over, but ah okay off again. (I bet you're really wondering WHAT in the world I am writing about, but no biggie.) Kim is out with her mom today, not sure what they're up to, but I hope they buy me something, that would be great. I'm considering going to the gym tonight, but I think I burned enough calories at work with my typing. I must have written a million words worth of code today for a website, but hey, I got a lot done, and that's all that matters, right? (yeah right.)

Hello Wink Viewers!

Thanks for visiting my blog!

Another Year, Another Haircut

Yes, it's true: it's now January again so I have made the annual trip to get my hair cut. Of course I'm not overly happy with it, but I didn't expect to be, so I wasn't as disappointed as I probably could have been. I have been going to a barber for the last year and a half and getting the standard ten dollar - ten minute haircut, and this time I decided to visit a "stylist" (mall chop shop). I'm happy with it, but I want to go to a real stylist and get a real style one of these days, even if it costs me two or three times as much. I don't want to go and just get my hair cut, I want to go and get a hairstyle, something that will make me look cool, and not like I devote more time into putting socks on in the morning than tending to my looks. One of these days I'll have cool hair. I just know it. (P.S. - if you know a great stylist in the Charlotte/Lee/Sarasota county area that would be willing to donate a great moviestar-calibre hairstyle in oooh, say about 2-3 months when my hair grows back, I will be your guinea pig! Promise you can do whatever you want to my hair, as LONG as you don't cut it less than an inch in length - I want a style, not a bald head.)

Incoming Grand Marquis At 50MPH - Hold Onto Your Lederhosen!

It's been a bit since I've posted an entry here, but that's why it's called "Occasional Smatter" and not "Daily Smatter". I purposely named it as it is so that I could take a break once in a while. I know that the two or three people that have actually ever visited this blog and still come back could handle more frequent posts, but quite frankly, my life isn't THAT exciting. HOWEVER, I do have some interesting news. I was in a car accident - yes that's right, one of those things where you get whiplash without paying to ride on a rollercoaster. I won't bore you with details, but I will say that the people who accidentally hit us were very nice, and I certainly hope the both of them are okay. Fortunately everything is going smoothly with the insurance companies, which is of course, good news; bad news being that my car now has a permanent record of damage which will cripple the resale value. On a lighter, but also very heavy note, I have been very busy at work. In fact, I think it safe to say that I have more work to do today and in the next couple of days that I will be able to handle, but I will press on because I can only do so much, right? You may also question why I am sitting here writing in my blog and not working, and the simple answer is this: I like blogging better. The more complicated answer: I'm taking a few minutes for a creative purge - I like that my blog is mine, that it's for no other person. I can write what I want, vent how I want, and express my creativity in the most pure form, and hope that anyone who reads it will at least have a better day because of it. I have heard recently that blogging is sweeping the nation, and I must admit that I did get stuck in the bristles of it. I say to all of you bloggers - keep writing, give all the nonbloggers something to do at work. We are creating an archive of our world, in our time, as we see it, and our writing will prove useful to history professors in years to come.

Phone Call Of The Day

I KNEW someone would give me something to blog about today. I could just feel it, building up until finally the phone rings and I answer. When I did, out of the speaker came a stream of words that were but an utterance of logical mystery meat, conversation without reason. A summary of the correspondance: Not Me: "I'm having a problem with my website, it seems to not be working, I don't know what's wrong with it but there are errors on it." Me: (visiting said website) "Okay, can you tell me specifically what is wrong with it, I seem to be able to view the website just fine." Not Me: "Well, one of the updates you made is wrong and my contact page isn't working." Me: "Okay let me take a look ..." Not Me: "I click on the contact button on our site and I tried to email you to tell you that the update needed to be changed but our contact page isn't working. All I can see is a page that says 'What's Your Image' but no contact information." Me: "... hmm, I don't know why you'd be clicking on your contact page to get a hold of us anywa ... OH, you mean OUR website contact page isn't working." Not Me: "umm, well I guess maybe." Hey, my website isn't working, all I get is this big huge "Google" logo and a search box and something about advertising programs and news, that doesn't look ANYTHING like my site, can you fix it?

So THAT Is How I Fix My iMac!

Found this on a forum, maybe it will help me fix my iMac, what do you think?

Is you fucking cd stuck? Paperclip No work? There come a time, you have to exept fact that you have to open it up and fix yourself. But I try fix problem "iMacGuyVer" way...My imac broken. My imac peice of shit. C.D. gets stuck everyday, but I can fix under 5 Min...

Here are some tool of those you might need:

1 credit card. 1 paperclip 1 bright light. 1 very thin tweezer. 1 Butter knife. If it not so bad: #1. I think like machine. Why machine want to eat cd? how far cd go in? First i try paperclip. machine want to push out cd, but cd is jammed. So i try paperclip eject with right hand and cridit card with left hand. put credit card on left side and try to push to right side like spinning chineese wheel of fortune. I try 8 times. if cd move out you need bright to see where is it. Then i take tweezerman and pull it out. This one no work? I try this one method.

I try to put bent butter knife in to catch center hole of CD while use paperclip eject at same time. When i catch center hole I pull out. Try 8 times ten then you can catch CD with tweezerman. Now my sure fire way... I take butter knife and insert into iMac slot almost 1 inches. I press eject with paperclip then i turn left and right alternating with butter knife. I am bending the plastic frame. I try in the left side, right side and the center works the most but try them all 3 times then cd comes ot to where i can catch him with tweezerman. You need think like machine. You need to be patient to catch him. If still not work turn imac machine upside down and try all over again...ha ha i never take to repair store!

Needless to say, I'm not sticking a butter knife in my iMac, nor am I going to attempt to fashion it into a chinese spinning wheel of fortune.